Downtime

I am on vacation, WooHoo! Well, not exaclty yet, but close. Officially, I will be on vacation Monday through Friday of next week. There is so much going on with the house, and with church, it seems like an odd time, but I really need it NOW! Some things will just have to wait.

Monday morning, Paige and I will leave for Sedona. We'll be gone until Wednesday. Not a long time away, but important quality time away. We'll be staying at a place on Oak Creek a little north of town. I'll post pics after we get back. We have no plans! Ok, actually we do. We are going to rest, and hang out together. I'm bring a couple of books to read (yes, one is my Bible!). We are also bringing the house plans to talk about landscaping. These are things we could do, or could work on (I'm also taking my computer to possibly do some writing), but we don't have to. There is no schedule, no agenda, no reservations (other than the room).

Downtime has become so important to me in the past few years. I think it's a combination of being older and wiser (realizing the importance), and just being older. Either way, the Biblical examples to withdraw before, during, or after times of stress, or extra effort are numerous.

I really needed this break more a couple of months ago, but Paige wasn't out of school yet. It's actually a better time since I just finished some writing and research that I have been working on for a while. My brain needs a rest. I've been looking at some foundational theological issues. I love doing studies like this, but they can wear me out too. Word studies and wrestling with Biblical concepts stretch me. That's what I love about them, but at the same time, studying doesn't come natural to me (God miraculously changed this for me when I began studying for ministry).

Paige had an incredibly tough year at school this year. SInce she has been out of school, she has focused on the house, and getting ready to move. Next Wednesday is her birthday, so I want to make sure that she get's some time to focus on rest, and decompressing.

We are both ready for some downtime, even though it doesn't seen like the right time. For us, together, there's no better time.

House Update

Here's the latest. The driveway/basketball court slab is poured as are the shed slab and the pull through slab. The wood floor is done. The tile is nearly done. Plumbing is done. We should have electricity this week. The boys started putting their closet shelves in. There is still a lot of detail work to be done. I realize you can't see it well in the picture, but I am pointing at a cross that is in a knot in the new front door. How cool is that!

We do have a move in target date of July 7th!

Daniel Conner

Daniel Conner spoke in services this weekend and really brought it! If you don't know him, you should take the time to get to know him. I have the privilege to watch him grow and mature as a pastor. My office is right next to his. Like a lot of us, he began in student ministry. Not that God had bigger plans, but God had other plans (I don't view Student Ministry as a stepping stone to becoming a "real" pastor - If you work with children or students, it doens't get any more "real" than that!). Daniel now oversees our care/compassions ministries here at Palm Valley Church. He is also leading us in our missions and outreach. It's fun to watch the energy, vision, and passion that he brings. I am excited to see where these ministries grow to under his leadership.

This weekend he spoke on serving and did great. I don't know if he has preached much, but it was obvious that he was letting God speak through him (especially during the 9:00 service this morning).

I remember my first sermon. It was in Mexico on a mission trip. I was in high school. I was so nervous I though I would be sick to my stomache. My youth pastor told me something that I will never forget. He said that when I am not nervous to handle God's Word is when I shouldn't speak. He was talking about the heart attitude and the power of God's Word. I also like what I heard from Greg, that when ego walks onto the stage, God walks off. That is so true! Speaking and teaching God's Word is humbling. This weekend, I heard and saw daniel and I could tell that ego wasn't on stage.

Way to go Daniel!

Leadership

During my life I have had the opportunity to be in nearly every position and play nearly every role in the church and in business. Here's a few key things that I have learned:

1 Keep it simple! The more complex you make structures, the less likely people are to be willing to support them. Entwined in this is clear and constant communication.

2 Keep lines of authority and responsibility clear. People need to know the chain of command.

3 Hire well! Hire people for skill, experience, creativity, and potential, not for their education, connections, or who they worked for.

4 Clearly define roles. People need to know the expectations, and limits. In this, provide opportunity to grow. What is their path forward to move up?

5 Provide autonomy. Turn people loose (as much as possible) to accomplish their tasks that fulfill the expectations. Don't micromanage it limits trust.

6 Provide authority. Give people as much authority as their position will allow, even a bit more than you are comfortable with (within reason). If they live up to the trust, give them more, you can always pull back if they aren't ready or able to handle it.

7 Hold them accountable. If someone meets expectation, praise them and encourage them. If they aren't measuring up, let them know, provide opportunity for growth, then cut them loose if they still can't get it done.

8 Inspire creativity. Challenge them to accomplish more than they think they are able. There is a fine line between being challenged and being overburdened so be careful here.

9 Serve the people who serve you! Jesus provided this example over and over, we should do the same. What can you do to show them that they are valuable to you better than serving them? More pay and bonuses are nice in any job, but people want to feel needed and appreciated more than anything else. On that note, pay them better than they expect, and be on the upper end of the scale rather than the lower end. That shows value too.

10 Cast vision and reiterate purpose often. Constantly remind people of the vision and purpose for doing what they do. Keep it in front of them. You must also show them that you are striving to accomplish the vision and fulfill the purpose as well.

I hope that these insights are helpful.

Back at it!

Yesterday was great! Sure, I was still hurting, and pain levels were still higher than normal, but I was able to be back at work and I actually got some things done. It was good to be back. It was really good to be able to be back. We have an awesome staff that God has knitted together. Together we are stronger, more creative, and can accomplish so much more for God's kingdom than any of us could on our own.

I am so thankful that staff was there to pick up the slack for me the past couple of days. I'm most thankful not that they picked up the slack, but that they were there, offering to do it. That's what good teams do. They don't wait until being asked or told, they see a need and jump in to fill it. Bob, Daniel, Ryan, Mark, Diane especially deserve my gratitude and appreciation.

The downside of being back is the realization of how much farther behind I am on some important projects. In my prayer time this morning, I especially prayed for strength, creativity, focus, and wisdom to accomplish what God wants me to accomplish today. I have my agenda, but I have learned to say, "Not my will, but yours be done." Life is so much better when I let go of my agenda and grab hold of His!

CMPS and Other Physical Challenges

For the few who read my blog and may not know about the health issues I live with, but sometimes write about, here's the deal:

I suffer the consequences of hard living when I was younger. Two bad knees (my right knee has been operated on twice, the second time was a major reconstruction including building a bone bridge to relocate a tendin and regrinding the knee cap and socket), a torn disk, a permanently damaged shoulder, multiple concusions, a stroke, multiple broken bones (including a broken neck), sprains, strains, and torn ligaments, and that's just what I can remember or have been reminded of (I have some permanent memory problems because of the stroke). I also suffer from wrestless leg syndrome and a neurological disorder similar to parkinsons (praise God the medications work to control the tremors - just don't ask me to write neatly!), and occational seizures that are similar to panick attacks.

On top of that is CMPS (Chronic Myofacial Pain Syndrome) and Fibromyalgia (Chronic Fatigue Syndrome is a by product - which also leads to near constant irritability). These are rare neuromuscular diseases that are especially rare in men (I'm so special!). It hit me nearly 10 years ago. I was on my way home from work late one evening and it was dark and I couldn't see a curbing that was sticking out and unmarked. I didn't think anything of it at the time. Minor damage to the car and I didn't feel hurt.

At about 2am the next morning my "adventure" began. I was awakened by agonizing pain in my back, ribs, and sternum. Imagine living with a wrenched back, broken ribs that won't heal, a really bad sunburn under your skin and a body that simply turns off at somepoint each day. I ended up unable to work for 14 months. Mostly, I sat in a recliner day and night alternating ice packs and a heating pad, with very little sleep each night. The hardest thing was that I could no longer wrestle with my two little (at that time) boys. During the 14 months I underwent myriads of tests, medications, home and alternative medicines and therapies, and nothing worked to any great extent. I saw so many Dr.'s and specialists that I lost count. They drew so much blood I could have opened my own personal blood bank. Nine months into all of this, I saw a Dr. who finally gave me a name to go with the pain. Paige and I sat in his office and cried. I finally had an answer. No cure, but at this point I was just glad to have a name and proof I wasn't crazy (at least clinically).

Through the years we have tried so many things, and have endured miriads of people who "have a friend who uses .... and it works so you have to try it." I try to be polite and listen, but I've tried so many things, including some whacky stuff, but I always try to validate claims with real research. We finally had a great combination, until VIOXX got pulled from the market. What I take now isn't as good, and I would gladly endure the risks if I were able to take it.

For now, I live with the up and down pain. I live with the medication "cocktail" that is working enough so that I am able to function most days. I take naps nearly every day (sounds great, but many days it's a hastle!). Some days I can do anything I want, while others, I'm like a vegetable in a recliner (and everything in-between). Fortunately, right now there are typically more good days than bad.

Through all of this, my most amazing, loving wife, has had to become the primary pread winner, and care for two active and athletic boys, and a sometimes invalid husband. She never knows from one moment to the next (nor do I) if I will be able to change a lighbulb or build a building. I am so thankful to God for bringing her into my life. I know that I couldn't endure this without her love, and the love of my gracious Lord, Jesus Christ.

That's pretty much it. It's enough. It sounds like a mess, and it is. One thing I have learned through this is empathy for those who may look healthy on the outside, but are dealing with unseen challenges. It's the "thorn inthe flesh" that I have been given, and I pray that I live with it in a way that brings honor and glory to Jesus Christ!

House update

We have a tentative move in date of July 5th! By the way, the address is 22612 W. Desert Lane, Buckeye, AZ 85326 (even though we are in county land, we have a buckeye address. They had to put us somewhere!)

The granite is in and looks great. The tilework is nearly done, and the wood will be completed today. Final plumbing work began today. The well is up, and Steve and Terri have water! We'll probably get water tomorrow as soon as all the faucets are finished. Friday we meet with the blind lady (Paige thought I was talking about someone who couldn't see, not someone who sells window coverings), the landscaper (for the walkway and circle-drive), and the cabinet guy. We decided to get a quote on the hall and laundryroom cabinets (but I am still planning to make the cabinet for the powder room). We also purchased the last of the appliances (except for the BBQ). Here's some pictures, enjoy:

48 Hours

Be forewarned, I'm going to whine in this post! I'm simply going to share my personal struggle with pain this past couple of days.

The last 48 hours have been the toughest that I have faced physically since I had a kidney stone last Thanksgiving! The pain has been excruciating and relentless. Imagine the body aches of the flu multiplied by 5 and add in a few sports injuries and a major sunburn to go with it. I have been in tears crying more than once during this time. Paige felt so helpless as her hubby stood crying this morning, having a melt-down that would put a four-year-old's tantrum to shame.

I have gotten "used" to living with pain. On good days it's about a 3 on a 10 scale. Usually, bad days are about a 7, but this weekend was pushing the limit. I knew I was in trouble when I went to pick up prescription refills Saturday. When I got to the Pharmacy to pick up the three medicines I call my "cocktail", they could only refill one saying that I needed to see the Dr. OK, it's Saturday, the on-call Dr. doesn't handle prescriptions, and they can't give me anything to hold me over. It turns out that someone other than my regular Dr. approved my last refill and added the stipulation not being familiar with the long term history.

That meant that I spent the past two days without two much needed medicines to keep my pain levels to manageable levels. The earliest that I could get in to see the Dr. today was at 1:30. Boy was I watching the clock today! I finally got new prescriptions and have taken the medicines, and they are beginning to kick in. I am sure that under more lucid conditions I could come up with some really good spiritual connections and comparisons, but I have had the concentration level of a piece of fruit! I haven't even been able to drive (except for driving home early from Church yesterday, which I hated, probably wasn't the wisest decision), and for those who know me, I love driving! As a side note, it was great to have several people pray for me and for other staff members offering to take care of things, you are all such an encouragment!!!

Yesterday I was in so much pain I resorted to some percocet I have for severe pain, but they didn't help much.

Anyway, it wasn't the best father's day, as far as how I felt, but Paige's parents were here (her folks are the best in-laws anyone could ask for!) and both boys were here and we grilled Rib-Eye. In many ways, the day couldn't get any better! I love my boys and am so proud of both of them. They have had to put up with a lot because of my physical challenges. They are truly a blessing.

Finally, the pain is decreasing. I am glad that I have never asked God why I face this trial in an angry way, only to try to understand what He wants me to learn. I have often asked that He remove it, but so far He has chosen not to. No matter what, I pray that even in my pain and the irritability it often produces, that God would be glorified and that my faith would be strengthened.

We All Need Mentors!

It couldn't have come at a better time in my life. I got a call from one of my mentors who was coming into town. We got to spend last night and most of today with Dennis and Joy, two of the most cherished people in my life besides my immediate family.

Dennis and I have talked through a great many things together. He taught me about pastoral care and hospital visitation. I got to see him endure victoriously the battle with cancer. I was witness many times as he lovingly cared for hurting people (sometimes it was me).

Dennis and I had a brief opportunity to serve in ministry together and enjoyed every minute of it. We wrote small group materials together and we such a great team working through passages.

God knew that I needed to spend time with Dennis, and brought him to me. We were able to talk through some really tough stuff that I have been struggling with. As always, he helped me see things from a different perspective and helped me to figure out the right questions that I need to be asking God.

I think that we all need mentors in life. Believers who are more mature than we are. We need people who have been in the battle of life and faith longer than we have. I am so thankful for people like Jim, Ben, Marty, Glen, and Dennis. These are men who God has used to teach me and to lead me not only in ministry, but in life. Praise God for mentors! I pray that one day I will be listed on someone else's list of those who impacted their life as these have impacted mine.

Stand Back and Watch God Work!

This weekends message wasn't particularly evangelistic. Greg talked about prayer. I love messages like this because I know that when people accept Christ, it is truly His doing and not an emotional response to the message.

This weekend was no exception. One person who came to Christ I am particularly excited about. She came to the Fresh Start Class last weekend and stayed after to ask a question about God that she was struggling with. Her view of God at that point prevented her from giving her life to Christ. We talked through some things and then prayed together. When I saw that she had accepted Christ, I was/am so excited! This is someone who I believe will be used mightily by God.

It seems that those who struggle the most before giving up and letting God have their lives are often so wholly committed that they can't help but to allow God to do great things in their lives. I can't wait to see what He does with this person!

24 - Day 4

Proverbs 6:16-19
16 There are six things the Lord hates— no, seven things he detests: 17 haughty eyes, a lying tongue, hands that kill the innocent, 18 a heart that plots evil, feet that race to do wrong, 19 a false witness who pours out lies, a person who sows discord in a family.

If you look at the beattitudes, you will find Jesus' contrasting parallels to these six.

I like to think of the contrast to this list, what God loves:

Humility, truthful speach, preservation of life, pure thoughts, eagerness to do good things, honest witness, and peaceful harmony. I found this great list in the Expositor's Bible Commentary.

If you focus on these things, you can't go wrong!

24 - Proverbs - 2

Proverbs 3:9 - Honor the Lord with your wealth and with the best part of everything you produce.

Applying this verse to my life has been a journey. Honoring God with my wealth was at one time, extremely difficult. I have grown hugely in that area.

In terms of honoring Him with the best of everything I produce is something that I hadn't thought of very much. What do I produce? In my years in the business world I was involved in the production of a variety of things. I have no idea how God could have used some the things that I produced.

I think that this verse speaks more to what 1 Peter 4:11 says, "Do you have the gift of speaking? Then speak as though God himself were speaking through you. Do you have the gift of helping others? Do it with all the strength and energy that God supplies. Then everything you do will bring glory to God through Jesus Christ. All glory and power to him forever and ever! Amen.

We "produce" more than just objects. We produce words, helps, and other things in accordance with the gifts that God gives us. Whenever we use our gifts to the maximum that God's strength enables us to, that beings honor and glory to His name. It's strange to think of speaking as something that we produce, but it is something that we do. Doing my best in all that I do will honor God! What do you do that honor's God?

24-Proverbs-1

This week we started the 24 series. The trailers have been great. Michael and his team have done an outstanding job!

We all received a pocket-sized booklet with 24 proverbs in it to meditate on throughout each day. Morning, noon, evening, and night we are to re-focus our attention on god. Here's the first day:

Proverbs 3:5-6
3:5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. 6 Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.

Initial thought:
How often do I "depend on my own understanding"? I am pretty good at relying on God for direction, but in my daily life, I tend to go it alone for the most part. Reliance seems like weekness to me. He has given me skills and abilities and knowledge, and I think He expects me to use them for His glory. In that, how do I rely on Him throughout the day? That is something I need to wrestle with. My prayer today is that God would show me how that works!

House Update

Here's the latest on the house. Paige and I went this afternoon to select our granite slabs. We should have counters in about 1 to 1 1/2 weeks.

They've started putting in the wood floors. Mudding has begun for the tile in the showers.

The stonework is nearly finished, and exterior painting will begin tomorrow.

I still have more ceiling fans to put up. We swapped out a couple from the current house that we want to take with us. I'm only able to work on it a little each day, and I needed some down-time this weekend. Hopefully, I'll be up to making some good progress this week.